TOKYO DINGBATS return for their 11th tour with a smaller, slimmed down squad, low on numbers and lower on ability.
Dingbats would like to dedicate their 2014 Bowl win to Jarod Harris, and will play 2015 for the memory of him and Phil Hughes. 62 not out forever.
Curly can be seen running round the outfield like a retarded puppy. His biggest contribution to the 2014 Bowl win was not batting. Promises not to snort tequila and to stay off stages and out of frocks. Curly will need to find an extra B50 this year to keep his whites clean and Terry's hands out of his pocket.
The Dinosaur is brushing off his Wonder Girls dance moves and blessing us with his bat throwing presence after a five year absence. Recovered from the Floggers' flogging, but probably no wiser on child-safe vocabulary. Boasts that his name sits along side the great Vivian Richards, whilst ignoring that it also sits along side the word "Turd".
Years of knowledge gained through personal experience saw Marty handing out the ice-packs, bandages and walking sticks to his injury-struck team-mates more used to being handed a vodka-slammer. The lovable Queenslander will be trying to make it two years in a row without injury, but few give him any chance, especially in a tight last ball situation with just 48 runs to defend.
A star for the Dingbats in their 2014 win, young Max has grown year by year. He has not simply moved out of his father's shadow, but casts his own shadow on Chris. No longer do people say Max is Chris' son, but since powering his way through the last tournament, people say to Chris, "Oh, you're Max's Dad?" Won't take his Dingbat team-mates out to his cool bars, cos "they're too white."
Mick probably isn't going to make it again this year, which is a shame. Not only can he play a bit of cricket and talk a lot of rubbish after a few drinks, he has picked up the tab for our shirts again, so here is a blatant plug for micklay.com for Japanese used car exports!
Dingbats will once again be seeing what they can pick up on Saturday night. Miss Terry will need to be quiet the player to fit in with this finely tuned bunch of athletes.....or at least have two arms and two legs.
Paul will be desperately trying to quash rumours of a comeback, once he sees the Dingbat line-up for this year. It's a very short line, and Paul has no intention of being part of it. Mad dogs and Englishman? Paul will be clinging to his Scottish heritage and parking himself on the right side of the boundary.