The SBCC is the cricketing arm of the Stuffed Beavers Athletic, Sporting and Social Club, with interests as diverse as Aunt Sally, Boules, Cremant, Motor Racing, Music, Rowing, Sailing and Whiff-Whaff.
This year's touring group comes to you via Springfield, USA and will no doubt be the most jaundiced team at the tournament. A host of debutants join some creaking stalwarts for our latest campaign for cutlery.
It would be remiss not to record our gratitude to the big man, Terry Skillett, who is a huge loss to the Sixes -Terry was as responsible as anyone for the SBCC's love affair with the Chiang Mai Cricket Sixes and we won't pass up the opportunity to toast his memory during the week.
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Barney Grumble
4th Tour. Barnard Arnold Grumble is never far away from a beer and can relied upon to be propping up the Beaver Bar during the course of the Sixes and dishing out the fines after a day’s play. Barney adds fire to the Beaver batting line-up and generally comes in immediately before the tail – or at number 1 as we like to call it.
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Bart Simpson
10th Tour. Bart is quite literally the leader of the pack this year as he introduces an entourage of Simpsons to the delights of Chiang Mai and the Sixes. There is some expectation that he won’t be on the phone quite so much as everyone he knows will be sat alongside him at the Beaver bar. We may need more chairs in the massage tent however….
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Chief Wiggum
5th Tour. Clarence “Clancy” Wiggum has had a busy year, having scooped both the coveted BOTY (Beaver of the Year) trophy at the 2018 Sixes and being presented with the batsman of the year award at the annual dinner. All this while serving as the Club President for the 2018-19 year. His leadership skills are second-to-none although it is to be hoped that he will consult with Groundskeeper Willie before commencing cleaning operations ahead of the mythical pool party.
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Groundskeeper Willie
3rd Tour. 2018 was a rollercoaster ride for Groundskeeper Willie: all booked in to tend to the hallowed turf of the Gymkhana Club before matters medical intervened and the Groundsman was grounded. Happily Dr William MacDougal is back to full fitness and ready to fit two weeks’ worth of touring into one week in CM.
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Homer Simpson
Debut Tour. A pure athlete, has great hand-eye coordination when hitting a golf ball. So decided to have a break from the PGA tour and help the Beavers regain the spoon. Who knows, a father/son partnership could be the key.
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Monty Burns
13th Tour. Mr Burns and Principal Skinner are back in the Beaver fold after a year of undercover ops across the border in Sapa. Charles Montgomery Burns is a man with fingers in many pies which, apart from the obvious hygiene ramifications, means one never knows which Monty will turn up on the day – will it be the ruthless business mogul or the doddery old nonagenarian?
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Otto Mann
3rd Tour. In typical laidback fashion, Springfield’s hippest bus driver only decided to rock up to the Sixes on the Monday before the tournament. Multi-talented Otto is singer, song-writer, political commentator as well as baby-sitter while his missus is on the telly. As if that’s not enough, he hosts every home game for the Beavers in the UK. Favourite Band: Stroller. Favourite song: I Don’t Think So.
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Principal Skinner
13th Tour. Like Mr Burns, Seymour is restored to the Beaver camp after a brief and, let’s face it, futile attempt to impersonate Vietnamese international cricketers. The bruises acquired on last year’s tour have just about subsided although there is some concern that there may be a lasting impact on his previously peerless bowling action. Perhaps that is not a bad thing…. It is widely acknowledged that Principal Skinner is a leader in name only.
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Edna Krabapple
12th Tour. There’s never a dull moment in the life of Club matriarch Edna – she was the first to solve the dilemma of the farmer crossing the river with the fox, the chicken and the corn, inspired by the number of journeys it generally takes her to get her children, her pets and her shopping home from a trip into town. A true lover of cricket – just don’t get her started on The Hundred…..
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Elizabeth Hoover
Nth Tour. Apart from her responsibilities with the Beaverettes, Miss Hoover can claim credit for most of the photographs of Beavers Being Bowled – not in itself an unusual occurrence, but it takes a rare talent to capture it on camera. As usual will have young Noah in support.
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Grampa Simpson
Debut Tour. Long suffering best pal of Lisa. Looks up to Bart and wishes he was like him so decided to come on tour.
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Kent Brockman
Nth Tour. Springfield’s most famous journalist will once again be broadcasting the breath-taking ball-by-ball Beaver batting and bowling to a global audience using the power of social media. Follow Stuffed Beavers CC on Facebook to keep up-to-date with Kent’s pity observations.
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Krusty the Clown
3rd Tour – Safe in the knowledge that he wouldn’t be the first clown to captain the England cricket team the FEC will continue his cricket apprenticeship at this year’s tournament. They say you learn more from failure than success so Krusty is likely to receive a cricketing education second to none.
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Lisa Simpson
Debut Tour. Sister of immediate past president Bart (obvs). Finally decided to come on tour to see what all the fuss is about. Looking forward to sampling all the gin.
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Maggie Simpson
Debut Tour. The better half of Homer (confusing, we know…). A former jockey and whiskey connoisseur. She shows true dedication following her husband to the ends of the earth to support his cricket debut. (Any excuse for another holiday)
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Marge Simpson
2nd Tour. Ahead of her forthcoming nuptials to Bart (we really might have to re-think this…), Marge returns to both cheer on the Beavers and lend her considerable talents to the wonderful Beaverettes. Rumour has it that she has had the wedding dress fitted already, so it will be interesting to see what sort of impact a week of tinnies and chicken kebabs will have. The Hen Party starts here!
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Ned Flanders
Debut Tour. Lifelong friend to Homer and Maggie (stay with us…). His main role is trying to keep them out of trouble, good luck with that!
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Patti Bouvier
7th Tour – Don’t let that cherubic face fool you, Patti is fiercely competitive which is why she is likely to spend most of the tournament in despair at SBCC performances on the field. On the other hand perhaps her rousing pep talks may inspire in the team a noble spirit that embiggens even the smallest of men.
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Selma Bouvier
9th Tour – Prefers the sound of chirping crickets over leather on willow. Selma is far more likely to be found scouring the ground for bugs than watching the action as she prepares for a future career in entomology (in addition to her plans to be an astronaut, YouTube star and vet). Fortunately this girl loves to party and will enthusiastically embrace all social activities - not sure where she gets that from.
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Waylon Smithers
4th Tour. Waylon, aka Lasith Malinga, has abandoned his attempt to become England qualified by virtue of residency and returned to Chiang Mai to maintain his non-Dom tax status (which is important – we already have two Doms). Missed the Sixes last year so has some catching up to do in terms of consumptions of Spicy Beavers.
